Monday, March 1, 2010

She's Shocked

I had the surprise of my life Saturday afternoon. No, seriously, I’m totally not exaggerating.

Michael Jr. and I were making a little detour in Yakima to try out some things at Essencia Artisan Bakery (now officially on my Just Passing Through list of mandatory stops) and I checked my mail while we waited. As I clicked the DELETE button on each stupid thing that came my way, I saw a message from an unfamiliar e-mail address. The subject line read: “my own e-mail!!!!” Huh?

I looked at the e-mail address again. No. It couldn’t be. But there it was. My mom’s first initial. Her maiden name initial. My maiden name. Her birthday. But how is that possible?

I clicked open the message and learned that not only did she have a 21 pound turkey in the oven AND a new e-mail address but additionally, she was sporting a new laptop. In the immortal words of Clark W. Griswold, “If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn't be more surprised than I am now.”

It might be easy to write me off as melodramatic. There are folks who read this blog who are older than my parents. They have computer skill-sets that far surpass anything I’m working with. There are people reading this who have parents and grandparents who rock The Internet. They understand The Google and may even have Facebook pages. It’s not unusual. But this is my mom we’re talking about.

Dad’s had a computer since, oh I don’t know, something like a little before I left for college. This picture was taken in 1987, I think. Right after he built the bookcases and computer desk. Dad’s upgraded and noodled things out over the years and seems to get how they work and how to get them to do what you need them to do. Mom on the other hand, never got involved with the whole computer/internet thing beyond making sure no dust collected on whatever model my dad was currently in possession of. Dad prints out e-mails from family and friends (with perhaps some comedic commentary of his own) and that’s been that.

Lest you think I’m denigrating this woman in any way, please refer to my Mother's Day post or anything else I’ve ever written about her here. She is Wonder Woman. She’s Mrs. Incredible. She’s Electra Woman AND Dyna Girl all rolled into one. She does it all and she does it very well. She’s the best example I’ve ever had of self-control, diet and exercise, sacrifice, love, and whatever you’d call the ability to totally bite one’s tongue when you really want to give someone the verbal slap down they so richly deserve. And everyone who knows her knows this. To know her is to be in awe.

(AND lest you think I feel I have some claim on these qualities by virtue of blood or osmosis, please know that this is nowhere near the case. In fact, I see myself as something of a cautionary tale and it’s just one more reason I’m freaked out to find her on the internet. I don’t want her to see me, warts and all, and be disappointed.)

So here she is with a laptop. This woman who has run my dad’s dental practice with a typewriter, White-Out, and cat-like reflexes for decades. I keep hearing that line from Seinfeld. When Kramer explained would happen if Elaine became friends with George’s girlfriend Susan: “Worlds collide” Kaboom!

It’s good though, right? She’s not one of those people whose children have no choice but to report them to the blog “Oh Crap. My Parents Joined Facebook” (“CONGRATULATIONS! YOUR PARENTS JUST JOINED FACEBOOK. YOUR LIFE IS OFFICIALLY OVER.”). And it would be great to have quicker, easier contact. Sharing pictures, stuff like that. So what am I so freaked out about? I don’t know. I just can’t quite believe it.

1 comment:

So, what do you think?