Saturday, December 5, 2009

You, You Stay Out of It!

Tonight we went to dinner and a movie with our friends Dave and Deena. I’d never been to Famous Dave’s and man was the brisket tasty! Michael and I weren’t particularly hungry so we shared and I think we were both regretting it when the brisket disappeared.

While we ate Dave told us a story about something that happened on a recent business trip. Deena tried to add her two cents right away but before she could get a sentence out he turned and said, “You, you stay out of this!”. We all laughed and immediately it was the catch phrase of the night. It was something I’ve been wanting to say for days.

I think it started the week before Thanksgiving at a dinner out with friends. My happy haircut was only a few days old and friends, I was feeling sassy and young. (Because I am. This is my mantra.) My dear Tia made a comment about what a great look it was and didn’t everyone like it? The non-blog reader to my right mouthed the word “NO” and shook her head.

Excuse me? Honesty has NO place in that conversation! You, you stay out this!

A few days ago I defriended a married couple. I did! I suppose it sounds mean or unnecessary but I did it and I did it with a smile. Her rude comment about a photo I’d posted of dinner was the straw that broke the camel’s back. These are folks whose comments on my posts are almost exclusively contrary. People who don’t seem to be in possession of common sense or social graces. Didn’t your mother teach you that if you can’t say something nice on Facebook, don’t say anything at all? You, you stay out of this!

I’m not really as cranky as I sound; I just think I’m getting older (yeah, I know) and I just don’t care as much about the costs of speaking my mind. But I’m not entirely brave; the people I defriended are not a part of my non-virtual life. I don’t have occasion to see them on a regular or even irregular basis. I guess that’s key, isn’t it?

Have you ever defriended or told off some you have to be around in the non-virtual world? I haven’t because if I’m bothered enough by them in the virtual world how much do I not want them approaching me about it face to face? There are a few people I’d defriend in heartbeat except I don’t actually want them to know how annoying I find them. I’d be just as happy to stay in the periphery of their little world.

I take that back. I defriended my aunt a few weeks ago. She just couldn’t stay out of it.

This is a brand new world, isn’t it? All new etiquette, all new problems. And people who don’t use Facebook do NOT get it. I remember talking about it this summer when Ellen was visiting. We were talking to my mom about who we’re in touch with now and I mentioned that my high school boyfriend was a friend. She said, “How can you be friends with people you aren’t friends with?” That’s a good question.

Oh dear! It just occurred to me that you may think I’m writing about you! Good heavens no! You, you make life worth typing.
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