Thursday, September 17, 2009

What A Shame

Okay, now I'm totally convinced Big Brother is watching. First I have hits from Bentonville, Arkansas straight from Wal-Mart headquarters on the blog I wrote about buying skinny jeans there. Straight to that particular one. No evidence of a Google search or anything. Now today the same thing happened but with Group Health in Seattle. Straight to my blog about managed care. I hope they weren't too disappointed.

I kept Sierra home today. Her ears still hurt and she’s got a fever now but on the up side, the redness, swelling, and blisters have retreated to well inside the Sharpie-dotted outline Dr. Isaacson drew on her leg yesterday. I sure hope she feels better soon; I'd sure hate for her to miss Sausage Fest. Right now she’s lying on the couch watching “So You Think You Can Dance” from last night and pouting because I brought her the wrong thing from Dairy Queen. I didn’t even know you could use “wrong” and “Dairy Queen” in the same sentence but there you go. I just did.

Oh! It must be that T-Mobile/MyTouch commercial because I can hear Sam screaming, “Fast forward! Fast forward! Turn it off!” which he does whenever he sees Whoopie Goldberg. She completely freaks the child out.

I had on some morning program a few days ago when I saw that Jay Leno interviewed Kanye West the night before. I slapped my forehead, frustrated that I forgot to Tivo it. Then I remembered I live in the 21st century, haven't become Amish (yet), and own a computer. I found it online and almost couldn’t believe what I was seeing! Did Jay really ask him That question? Yeah folks, he did.

Jay welcomed him, thanked him for coming, then asked if he’d had a rough day. He told Jay it was extremely difficult. Next Jay asked him to pinpoint the moment when he knew what he did was wrong. Was it as he did it? Afterward? Kanye said he knew as soon as he handed Taylor the mic and she didn’t keep going. I’d be willing to bet that he knew it was Wrong before that. I think he was referring to the moment when it became apparent to him that it was a This-Is-Going-To-Bite-Me-In-The-Butt sort of wrong.

We think of Hollywood as being full of liberality and loose morals. Don’t get me wrong, it is. But do you see what Jay was doing? He was parenting Kanye and he was doing it WELL. No raised voices, just straight talk. Jay finished by telling Kanye he was fortunate enough to meet and speak with his mother some years ago before she died. He asked him this question:

“What do you think she would have said about this? Would she be disappointed in this? Would she give you a lecture?”

Kanye sat there for a minute, cast his gaze to the ground and tried to fight the tears.

WOW! I was so surprised and impressed by that question. So often we see celebrities getting a pass for whatever lame antics they get up to but this time when a person behaved badly, everyone circled the wagons around the wronged person and leveled an underused and totally appropriate sanction on the perpetrator: Good old-fashioned SHAME. Since the dawn of time it’s how we humans have done business. It’s good to see it still works just fine.

Question of the Day: Do you use shame as a parenting technique or did your parents use it on you? Were you more concerned about disappointing your parents than an actual punishment? Okay, I guess that’s three questions.
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  1. Hi, I am first time here at this blog. Its very nice and interesting. I wanna to visit here very often. Thanks for this informative review.

  2. Totally hated disappointing my parents. Heck, I still do. You know what, I hate disappointing anyone. That is why, on a Friday night, I am sitting here, fighting through my reader to comment on all the blogs in it.

  3. Yeah, my mom used shame and guilt as huge parenting techniques on my. I try to steer clear of most of them. I always tell my kids that I know that I have taught them the correct morals and values and that although I may questions some of their actions, I trust them and I trust what I have taught usually works well, plus teaches them to trust their own instincts instead of relying on mine!


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