Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Fun

“I like fun.”

Josh announced this to me recently as he blew bubbles in the kitchen. I turned and laughed out loud! He said it in the same way a person might say they like seafood or parasailing. It was something he felt was at least somewhat unique to him.

I need to work harder on the fun department. It’s so easy for me to get caught up in the never ending To Do lists—lists that are conspicuously free of cool stuff.

As a kid I had this idea (as, I suppose, most kids do) that adults were lucky. So lucky. They could do whatever they wanted. Of course reality hits and by that point you’re left dealing with kids laboring under the selfsame delusion. They look at how I spend my time and figure it’s because I really, truly want to. I really, really want to unload those dishes in the morning and fold clothes in the afternoon. I get a kick out of vacuuming and a natural high scrubbing toilets. They have done these jobs and know they are not fun. For them. I think they don’t realize what would happen if I didn’t do these things for any length of time.

It is hard to disabuse oneself of the idea. I mean I still kind of hold out hope that being an adult really does mean doing whatever you want. I just haven’t grown up yet, right?

It’s been one of those days. A few things went in a distinctly bad direction. In no way according to plan. Then I ended up getting my feelings hurt which I realize is completely my own fault. I’ve felt dangerously close to becoming like The Reptile Man, showing the kids THE IMAGINARY LINE OF DEATH. Do Not Cross! I’m like his water moccasin Cranky Frank. So ornery he often bites his own tail. Seems to describe me exactly. Today. Tomorrow’s just got to be different.

When my Grandpa Huck lay dying he wrote a letter to his wife and 10 children. In it he expressed his love for them and wrote this:

“Now I wish I would have spent more time in recreation with you than I did.”

I like fun too. I guess I just have to schedule it in like everything else.
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